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  • Book Review: “Daindreth’s Assassin” by Elisabeth Wheatley

    Stars: 4.5 out of 5

    Genre: Fantasy Romance

    Book Length: 276 pages

    Format Read: Paperback

    Published: 2021

    This book was highly enjoyable. I loved the slower pace and the enemies-to-lovers trope of the story. As this book also doesn’t contain sex scenes, the yearning is written excellently. To be fair, I would say the enemies-to-lovers trope is primarily at play at the beginning; they feel more like a friends-to-lovers couple as the story progresses. Friends-to-lovers is my favorite between the two tropes, so I was happy.

    The story’s pacing feels cozy until the action scenes begin; once we’re in a fight, the pace picks up appropriately, and the scene plays out in my mind clearly based on the description. This is perfect because I find I hate when a book’s action picks up too quickly and makes me go back to read like “wait, wait, WAIT, where are we? What happened??” I stayed immersed in this book from beginning to end.

    I enjoy Elisabeth’s writing as well because it clearly conveys the story and characters’ feelings, and it doesn’t have the shock factor written into it that some of the most popular authors lean on. The book is written for an adult audience, but without an abundance of cursing or crude jokes and comments. These things are in the writing, but not forced in for the sake of it; these moments fit the overall story or emotion for the moment.

    My Favorite Moments

    **Spoilers Ahead**

    Amira’s (second time) meeting Daindreth on pages 41-44, and specifically when he kissed her hand in greeting. Her sassing Thadred was also wonderful. I, too, choke to death all the time.

    Daindreth asking King Hyle for Amira’s hand in marriage on pages 48-50 was a top favorite moment. I felt just as confused as the rest of the room with the court.

    That moment is quickly followed by the fight between Amira’s stepmother and herself. The anger was palpable and satisfying. Queen Hyle never stood a chance. This results in what any good MMC does.

    Page 71 is one of the first moments that I really liked Daindreth. He betrays everyone’s feelings on this later, but he tries here and other times in the story.

    The meeting between Amira and the Empress sets the perfect tone for their whole relationship in the book.

    The whole of chapter 9. It’s an entire favorite.

    Page 141 – “Who did this?” Gets me every time.

    The kiss on page 176 and the resulting conversation with his possessiveness and yearning showing on 177-178 – gah! I have no words for how good it is.

    Chapter 17 made me mad in the best way. The betrayal.

    Finally, on page 233, my eyes couldn’t open any wider, and I might have cheered aloud. “The chokehold broke like a cut rope.”

  • Stop the Doomscroll 2025 Update

    It has been a few months since I last posted. Part of this is because I was failing for a few months. I kept the social media apps off my phone, BUT I started using my phone’s web browser to scroll Instagram for hours a day again.

    SO. I have now gotten through my smartphone and uninstalled everything that is not an only-functional app. This means my phone has: calling, texting, maps for emergencies, and music that consists of only downloaded songs for offline listening. I will also use my phone camera to take a photo in a quick moment, but I’m trying to use my point-and-shoot digital camera instead.

    Limiting this and placing my phone in one room with the ringer on for emergency calls only has dropped my screen time significantly again. My screen time on Saturday was 6 minutes TOTAL and it was all spent in the text messages app seeing pictures of my niece and nephew.

    I use my smartphone like a landline at home (making phone calls?! with my voice?!) and I keep it with me for emergencies when I’m out and about. I mean, I keep it with me for emergencies and offline music.

    When I use Instagram or Facebook, I use them on my computer. When I watch YouTube, I watch it on my computer or my TV. That’s about all that I do online as well as writing here.

    I’ve been reading the Terry Pratchett disc world Death series. I’ve been crocheting a (plain) blanket. I’ve been working my day job. I’ve been spending time with my toddler. I’ve been writing in my bullet journal.

    Previously, I was spending 6-8 hours (!!!!!!) on my smartphone. Per. Day. I am immensely proud that I’ve brought that number down to 6-8 minutes per day and that I’ve made progress on all the above items instead.

    In the next couple of weeks or days, I am going to begin writing more often and sharing some more photos of the single-use tools that I am using in my day to replace the use of my smartphone. I will also share some of the resources that I enjoy that are a source of inspiration for me to keep away from my smartphone.

  • How to Use Project Management In Daily Life

    I recently underwent the hardest test of my career: the Project Management Institute’s Certified Associate in Project Management. Along the way, I found out that I truly have a passion for project management as a field. I also found that there are many ways to make use of the principles of project management methodologies in your daily life. If you have any project (and, as my manager says, truly: what isn’t a “project”?) I hope that this is useful to you.

    First, the project management methods and systems all say that a project’s definition is any unique endeavor that has a defined start and end date. I have personally found that in the day-to-day, these endeavors may not all necessarily be unique but they do have a start and end, so deep cleaning my whole entire house can definitely be treated as a project. It is different from my weekly regular cleaning schedule, but it isn’t necessarily “unique.” The methods still apply if you can put a definite start and end to any of your endeavors.

    To begin the project initiation path, we must have our defined goal and identified our stakeholders. A recent personal project of mine is a crochet sweater. Defined goal: make a lovely spring sweater. Who would the stakeholders be? Stakeholders are anyone who is interested in the project and its completion, or anyone who will be working on the project. Back to my crochet sweater, the stakeholders are me, myself, and I: I will be the one wearing the finished sweater, I am the one who wants the finished sweater and the one who initiated the project, and I am the one who will be constructing the sweater by hand. If you want to make your project initiation more “official” you can make your project charter (there are many online examples and templates) and enlist the help of a few more stakeholders. These can be people who will be helping you in your endeavor (such as family deep cleaning the house with you) or someone you want to be held accountable to. Once you have other people involved, I highly recommend creating the project charter so that the goals and stakeholders are on a piece of paper. This just helps to keep the project clear because if it’s just in your head, it won’t remain clear.

    Once the project is initiated, it’s time to begin the planning, budgeting, and scheduling phase. In the case of my crochet sweater, this mean listing all the resources that I will need to complete the work and allocating those resources on a schedule. Resources will include things like labor, time, supplies, and money for those supplies. For my sweater, I will utilize my skills to use a standard size crochet hook to turn two skeins of synthetic yarn into a pattern that I found free on the internet. I know that I am a slow crocheter, I work full time, and I have a family with a child, so my time devoted to the project will be very limited. You don’t necessarily have to create an official schedule for a personal project unless you really would like to see it through to completion. In true project management methods, do not use a hard date for when you think the project will be done. Estimate the amount of time it should take based on the resources that you have and create the schedule that way. If needed, you can adjust your schedule as you go, but keep your stakeholders informed if you do! In the case of the crochet sweater, it would take me approximately a year to complete the project.

    Now that you have your project goal and plan, it’s time to begin the work! This is the execution phase. It’s when things start to come together (perhaps fall apart a little bit, then come together again) and you begin to see the project come into being. Communication is the name of the game if your project involves a project team and stakeholders. For example, if you are deep cleaning, everyone should have an assignment already established during the planning phase. As tasks are completed in the deep cleaning project, ensure that your team has all the resources and supplies they need, check in with them on status updates, and check in with anyone who is awaiting progress updates as the project is completed.

    After the execution phase, it is the closing phase. This is when the deliverables or the results of your project are handed off to the proper parties and any lessons learned from the process of the project are documented. In the example of the sweater, this means that I have my new, handmade sweater to wear, and I should take notes about what went well and what did not go well with my project, whether it was with the planning or the execution. In the example of the deep cleaning the house, the deliverable is the nice, shiny, clean house delivered to the family that resides there. If you worked with others, a good way to exercise the closing phase is to ask them how they think the project went and what, if anything, they would do differently. You can do this with an electronic form after completion or over a pizza dinner after completing the work. Take notes of what everyone says if you don’t use a form.

    Now, there are many different methodologies for project management. This outline above loosely follows the Waterfall approach with a little bit of an agile idea. Most home projects and simple projects can easily follow a Waterfall approach. There are many more methods that are outlined in the Project Management Body of Knowledge as well as in courses on Coursera and LinkedIn Learning. The outline that I have provided definitely does not encompass all the ways someone could use project management in their daily, personal life.

    If you have familiarity with project management, how would you utilize the ideas and methods in your everyday life? If you aren’t familiar with project management, what do you think you could use in your life from the methodology?

  • Stop the Doomscroll Weekly Recap

    Over the week, I did find two new apps to use but they are not time-wasters. The two apps are Wellos and Fable.

    Screen time recap last week

    Wellos is a health app that I have access to through my insurance. Fable is a book tracking app that also has book groups. I saw it through Instagram before I got rid of it and Fable is a great alternative to Goodreads since I’ve been trying to drop Amazon. (Goodreads is owned by Amazon.)

    Even with the addition of health and reading tracking, my screen time for the week went down by 58% from the week before.

    By creating a barrier to the apps for myself by only accessing them on my computer, I have greatly increased my reading time. I was able read the majority of the first Wheel of Time book in about 3 days. (The book is 744 pages!) I also finished reading ‘Home is Where the Bodies Are.’ (Not my favorite read.)

  • Stop the Doomscroll Day 2

    Today was a more typical day with listening to YouTube in the morning and the evening but it is still progress. The screen time app said that my daily average is down 76%!

    Screen time 3.24

    Even though it looks to be more than I would like, this is exactly what I was hoping for.

    As an anecdote, I feel that my mood has been more stable but also more neutral. That is to say, I often feel like I feel nothing. It’s true that emotions are not supposed to be up and down constantly and shifting from very high to very low quickly, but I just feel very neutral and it feels like nothingness right now. I hope that using my time productively by making things and cleaning things will help any boredom to become fulfilling.

    I have made progress in reading: I read two chapters of “Home is Where the Bodies Are” at lunch time and I read one chapter of the first “Wheel of Time” book in the evening.

  • Stop the Doomscroll Day 1

    I made progress with my action steps!

    My screen time on 3.23

    By deleting the social media apps, I have reduced my daily screen time tremendously. My daily average according to the app was 6 hours and today my usage was 44 mins. Granted, this was on a day off from work and I had errands to run, so I didn’t have time or a reason to listen to YouTube today like I normally do.

    My previous plan was to check in weekly but I feel that daily checking in will help me to achieve my goal more efficiently since I will be keeping my eyes on it.

  • Back to Stop the Doomscroll

    Back at the beginning of the year, I made a decision to stop my doomscrolling habits. Now at the end of the first quarter, I can say, that habit did not go away and it maybe even got worse.

    I am here at the beginning of Quarter 2 to finally make and keep this promise and work on my habit of doomscrolling.

    But first, my current habit:

    My current weekly screen time

    As you can see, in a week’s time, Instagram stole (actually I gave them willingly) about 18 hours of my time. In a week.

    YouTube looks bad at almost 14 hours but for that, I mainly pop headphones on and listen to videos while I accomplish other things.

    Facebook wasn’t terrible at almost 2 hours in a full week but again, that’s two hours of sitting, scrolling, maybe interacting, but doing nothing.

    In a week, almost a full day was used on social media apps. A full day. 21 hours and 13 minutes.

    A goal needs steps. First steps:

    I have deleted Instagram, Threads, LinkedIn and Facebook from my phone. I can access them on my computer as needed, and with that, I can set aside an intentional amount of time in my office for using social media apps.

    Next week, I will check in with how this time compared to last time.

    Second step:

    If I feel like I want to scroll, I will read a book. I have nine books I am currently reading from my TBR pile. Let’s see how many of those I can finish with the 21 hours not being allocated to social media.

    Have you made similar time-management decisions? How did they affect your life?

  • The Goal Planner That Made Me Reconsider Goals: Makselife

    My previous main planner had the goal of simplifying my life. But it began doing the opposite. I started obsessing over the daily details and then writing down the same exact things everyday, believing that it would automate my life and bring myself into consistency. I’ve been drowning in this postpartum season of life and simplifying sounded good. Then comes the Makselife planner. I had bought this planner around April when it was on sale and around the same time I bought the other planner. I’m not sure why, but I had dropped it after it came and I tried to only use the goal work in the beginning of the book to find myself again. April through July ended up being chaos and my whole life and house looked like it. I brought the Makselife planner out of my shelf and put everything else away, telling myself to only use this planner to try and level things out and it has worked for the best.

    The Makselife planner was made by a life coach named Sierra Friend and it came out first in 2019. Being a planner enthusiast, I had seen it around but the relatively high price tag always pushed me away. A one-year Makselife planner is regularly $76 according to the website so it’s one of the more expensive specialty planners. The company describes itself as a luxury planner company so the price makes sense.

    The purpose of putting the goal planning pages with the daily agenda pages is to keep your goals up front and plan out your days and actions with your goals in mind. Most planners keep the two separate or a goal planner company only releases a goal planner but not a daily agenda so this planner is unique in that it keeps the two completely together in one book.

    There are 8 areas of life in the book that are the areas for goals and weekly actions. That may sound like a lot but in my case, most of the 8 can overlap or each can have its own goal that ties in with a goal from another life area, especially since my life has one overarching theme in it right now which is motherhood. According to the company, you don’t have to use all 8 areas if that’s too much for you but each area is important to the facets of most individual’s life and goals.

    With this in mind, this planner has been my best tool for finding myself again and calming the sea of chaos around me that is my mental health, physical health, and physical environment.

    They just came out with their 2024 planners at the end of September and I am anxiously awaiting being able to dive into the goal setting pages for the start of the new year.

  • My Favorite Christian Resources

    In this day and time, it is getting more and more difficult to find Christian resources that actually use the Bible as the foundation for the material. (Shocking.) Because I’ve been running into this problem repeatedly, I’m sure many other Christians are too so I want to share a list of some channels and books that have helped me in my studies. If you have some resources as well, I would love to hear what they are.

    Just a side note as well, I’m sure there are some minor issue disagreements that I have with some of the creators and authors that I’m listing here but overall, they are Christians who believe the Bible is the word of God and that faith in Christ is the only necessity for salvation.

    1. The Messed Up Church YouTube Channel – This channel is run by the Kozars, Steve and Paulette. They post videos critiquing messages from mega church pastors and ministry speakers who primarily use their speaking skills to make a profit rather than to properly teach from the Bible. The videos are slightly chaotic and disorganized, but their videos feel much more like a conversation uncovering the manipulative techniques in these speeches. They are both very clear that they are not teachers but they are laypeople, which makes most of their videos easily understood and relatable. I especially like their use of humor but they’re also clear that the tactics of these speakers is very serious and ruining the lives of their followers.

    2. Fighting for the Faith YouTube Channel – This channel was the inspiration for the Kozars with their channel but it is run by a Lutheran pastor, Chris Roseborough. He also primarily posts videos critiquing mega-church pastors and other church leaders who manipulate Bible verses to tell the story they want to tell or to support the life lesson they want to tell but only by ripping a verse (or passage) out of context. A bit that he also posts is called Prophesy Bingo, a game he plays with guests to essentially show that all of these self-proclaimed “prophets” use similar empty buzzwords and phrases in their supposed prophecies and predictions. This channel also uses plenty of humor while teaching the seriousness of understanding scripture to the Christian life.

    3. Long4Truth 1 YouTube Channel – This channel is another married couple, the Longs, Daniel and Robin, and they also discuss false preachers from mega-churches but they have covered additional topics such as “Christian” Bible study books and cults that have started due to the misinterpretation of scripture. They are also laypeople so they can explain these topics in ways that are easy to understand while still being a broad study of the development of mainstream Christianity.

    4. Counterfeit Kingdom book by Holly Pivec and Doug Geivett – In the same vein as the study of supposed “Christianity” is a book that discusses a false Christian movement that has arisen called the New Apostolic Reformation that is a branch that claims that the offices of apostle and prophet from the Bible are still active today. This is contrary to the previously well-understood role that apostles played in the New Testament. Apostles in the New Testament were in the role if they were eye witnesses of the resurrected Christ. Even the late comer Paul (previously Saul) saw Jesus Christ. This book goes into detail about the movement of the NAR and the results of the beliefs that the movement teaches to its followers including spiritual abuse.

    5. The ESV One Year Bible – This Bible is the easiest reading plan for reading the entire Bible in one year. I prefer the English Standard Version translation of the Bible and the One Year Bible is offered in multiple translations including NIV and NLT. I admit that I don’t read it perfectly every single day but each reading is dated, allowing you the ability to know where to read each day, which is often the first step to making a daily habit of reading the Bible – knowing what to read or where to start each day. The readings include a section from the Old Testament, a section from the New Testament, a section from the Psalms and a verse of Proverbs, making it very easy to read through the whole Bible.

    6. The English Standard Version Women’s Study Bible – This is a starting place for me to further understand some of my other reading in the One Year Bible. This Bible includes study notes and references to other related verses of the Bible such as the prophecies and their coming true. I’m building a further library of commentaries and notes regarding scripture but this Bible has been my starting place.

    Please let me know of your favorite study resources and I would be happy to look into them! I also want to continue to share more resources as I find them so I may do regular posts like this one.

    (None of the links in this post are sponsored)

  • Today I learned that Threads exists

    Right after I finally have the nerve to permanently delete my social media accounts from Instagram and Facebook, they come up with Threads. My profiles are now permanently deleted so I won’t be re-joining but I just had to laugh at the situation.

    I was also completely out of touch of the launch of Threads. I started seeing the name of the network on YouTube, my last remaining “social media” type of account, and I got confused. The branding of its posts looks similar to Twitter so I assume it’s Meta’s version of Twitter now that Twitter seems to be losing its user base and credibility.

    In any case, I’m glad to be rid of social media. I have my time and my mind back. I feel as if I’m rediscovering myself as I should have been able to do in my later teen years and early 20’s. Also glad that I never got into TikTok or else I may never have gotten to this point.